wordless 4*2*08

Wordless Wednesday

He's MIA and I'm Numb

In blogging about addiction I have mentioned by brother Adam before. I heard from my sister last night, she brought me some "old" news. I say old because this is not the first go around. My brother is a drug addicted and has been his whole adult life and majority of his teen years.

I believe my brother was about 13 the first time I caught him smoking weed. I am assuming that he had been doing it well before the night I caught him. I know that he had already been drinking by then so there is no telling what else he had tried by that age. When he was around 16-17 he had admitted to doing alot of other drugs to me. Hard stuff.
After my parents divorce my mother had to send him to live with my dad in Houston. She had had enough of the drugs, lies, stealing and the cracked out friends that come along with that lifestyle. Not too long after that my mom was killed in a car accident, and he never made amens with her. That led him on a downward spiral of drug use and depression. Several years later he hit bottom and checked himself into rehab for cocaine use. He stayed there for 90 days and cleaned up. I was really proud of him. Keeping him from moving back to Houston I offered for him to move in with my family and gave him a job with our company. That was not long lived and I had to ask him to leave. He then went to my sisters. After several months of being there, he started getting back to his old ways again. Then it was on to a friends and then another....... Finally ending back up in Houston with my dad. Fast forward a couple of years. He has been doing well these past several months. Got into Culinary School in Jan. Doing great and loving it. Up until recently that is. Not sure what happened but a couple of weeks ago dad found Meth in the apt. and noticed that he was high. He has since been MIA for over a week, took the suburban, withdrew $600 from dad's checking acct. and has no cell phone on him.
My dad is beside himself, my sister is overly concerned, and I am just numb. I guess I feel this way because it has been going on for too long. The endless phone calls of what he has gotten into now; no job, no money, drugs, jail, stealing and the list goes on. He knows no other life style. Praise God he doesn't have a wife or child to take care of . He couldn't do it. He can't even take care of himself. He has never had too. He has been bailed out of everything "BAD" situation he has ever gotten himself into. All because of the guilt or pity he throws out to anyone that will fall for it.
Been there, fell for it and got screwed over. I have had my share days of worrying myself sick, crying myself to sleep and rubbing my knees raw in prayer for him. I just cant handle it this time. I am just now recovering from what I went through with my sister last year. Finding out that she was also an addict (prescription drugs) about did me in........
I use to have a hard time dealing with the fact that my family is full of addicts. I have brought it up in prayer so many times, read books and the bible on it. I am learning to cope with it. It is not something that I will ever truly understand. The drug/alcohol part of it anyway. There are addictions to all sorts of things and I am guilty of plenty. Just not ones that are mind altering so to speak. But I have something that is way more satisfying, Jesus Christ. He is the only one who can fill that empty hole in our heart. We could waste years trying to fill it with things, people, etc. But he is the only one that will fit in it.
I thank God that I am not following in my family foot steps and that I am not an addict of drug/alcohol. I am Saved by grace through faith and it is Christ that I put my trust into everyday to guard me from the tricks that Satan pulls on you to go out and get high! I pray that I will be able to break this spiritual curse that has been going on for years in my family. I also pray for their chains of bondage be broken. For them to turn their addictions over to Christ and ask for forgiveness, and Except Him in Salvation.

Week gone in a flash.

Where on earth has this week gone? It has totally flown by. Alot of my time, and money was spent it various Dr./Dentist offices this week. I had an appt to get my leg checked out. I've been having something going on in my left calf muscle, feels like a pulled/strained muscle. I decided I was tired of it nagging me and went to the Dr. Wed. morning. After getting worked up by my sister about a possible Blood Clot I was for sure having this checked out. I did and they ordered a ultrasound that afternoon. Thankfully I don't have a clot, but my nagging problem is still present. There went another 6 hours of sick time.
Then I was previously scheduled to take of Thursday for 3 more appts. 9 am Dustin had a dentist appt. for cleaning and xrays. I am getting ready to put him into braces. Things never work out like I hope for. I was wanting to get dental work done and see the orthodontist for a consult by the end of the school year. That way we could do braces before starting school again. HECK NO! The little turkey needs to put more time and effort into brushing his teeth. He only has one cavity but has gingivitis disease. Also we found out that his wisdom's have to come out before he gets braces. Just Great! Then we had an 11am appt for a recheck on Lane's medication and also found out that his EEG was normal. The lady told while we were getting it done that it will only pick up seizure activity that was happening during the test. Well Hello I could tell ya that he was not having one then. The only time he even shows symptoms of one is when he is coming around after a Rage.
After that appt., we met my sister for lunch at the Olive Garden. The Best salads and bread sticks EVER! By this time Lane is starting to get uncontrollable from being tired and restless. Afterward we stopped by to get Dustin's hair cut. That child has got some nappy hair.
Then we headed to our last appt. At 2pm was a recheck for Dustin at the ENT. We need to have a procedure done on his nose so he can breathe better. That place was packed. I will try to never have to go there ever again Unless I get the first appt. for the day. There is no sense in over booking your patients or running that far behind. We were there for over 2 hours.
There goes another 8 hours of vacation time from work.
I have had so many full days off from being sick, a child sick and dr. appt days that I have used so much of my vacation/ sick time from work. At the rate I am going I will not have any paid time off by June. Thank God we do not have a vacation scheduled this year.

wordless 3*26*08

Wordless Wednesday

Got Mud?

What a beautiful weekend we had here. The weather was so nice. I did something Saturday that I have not done in a long time. I spend some recreational time with my husband. We went on a mud ride with some friends. It has been 7 years since either of has been out there. We were there when Chris's cousin's Uncle Joe died. It was a freak accident but since we were standing just feet away from the truck when it happened, Chris just got away from big mudding trucks all together. But that is a whole another story. We went had a good time, got muddy and came home safely.

Chris had to work Sunday (12 hours) and I had to go get Dustin from his dad's. I made sure the Easter Bunny stopped by the house before I left. Lauren, Wes and Lane went to SIL's house. The other inlaws came up for a day with the grandkids, cooking out and egg hunt. We usually every year do Easter over there. They came home with plenty of eggs and candy. More than we need at the house.

Hope everyone had a Blessed Easter.

My trip to Austin was very long. There was tons of traffic, and it took 1hr 45 min longer than it usually takes me. Dustin had a good time on his skiing trip. He came home in one piece, Praise the Lord!

Celebrate Life with Jesus!

Springtime is among us and with that, we think of Easter. Many celebrate this day hunting Easter eggs, trading baskets and having BBQ cook outs with family. Fighting the crowds at the local mall to have their child’s picture taken with the over sized, fuzzy, floppy eared bunny. Dress up in their Sunday’s best to go to one of the only church service they will attend for the year. Some people all over go to church only 2 times a year, Easter Sunday and Christmas. However, it is not about just those “traditions”. Over 2000 years ago, a young man walked the earth spreading the love of God, Healing, teaching and performing miracles. He was shunned, cursed, beaten, hated and was followed and loved by few. His name is Jesus Christ. He was beaten and hung on a cross to die for you and I. To die, for the world to live, throughout eternity. Jesus died for the righteous and the unrighteous. John 3:16 says ”For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Eternal Life through the Birth, Death and Resurrection of Jesus Christ, Lord of Lords. God, our heavenly Father loved us that much. Romans 5:8 states that “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Three days after he shed his precious blood on the cross for all humankind, he rose from the dead to ascend to Heaven to sit next to the Father. He is alive today in Heaven with Father God. “For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit…” as stated in 1Peter 3:18.
Jesus said in John 14:6, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Through his death and resurrection, He is our only way to eternal life with our Heavenly Father. In Acts 2:21 Jesus says that, "And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”
You can have a living relationship with your creator right now, today. All you have to do is believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who was sent to earth to die for your sins, Past, Present and Future. Confess it with your mouth, Believe it in your heart, and repent from your sins. Romans 10:8-10: 8 “But what does it say?”The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart," that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.
How about spending Easter this year celebrated “Life”, The Life of Christ Jesus in You!

Fireproof

Please Check out this post It will be something you want to mark your calendar for.


Fireproof

making pops proud

Here are the pictures I promised from Mississippi. They are of my cousin Jennifer, my kids and our cousins.

Pop and Lane Man on the Golf cart.

Pop and his granddaughter Jennifer

Jennifer and Julian, she wanted to take a picture with handcuffs on. Making her momma and daddy proud!

Jennifer with Wes, Alden and Lane.
As you can see the sun was right in their eyes.
Lane loved turning on the lights and sirens. He always talks about police mans, as he would say it. Now I pray that that was the only time that he will see the inside of a police unit.

Wordless 3*19*08

Wordless Wednesday

gypsy and Tahoe

Well Dustin made it to Lake Tahoe with his dad. This was his first plane ride ever. Here are a couple of pictures he sent to me from the plane.

They will be on their skiing trip there until Saturday.

Chris sent me a picture of Gypsy Bell, his puppy, this evening. She is 1 week old today. He has been bonding with her these last few days. I think she is already spoiled.

We are heading out of Mississippi in the morning sometime. Not sure what time we are leaving because the weather is going to get bad in the middle of the night. Being that I am in the truck going home with twice the stuff I came with, I need to wait until most of the rain is past. Hopefully it will be early and we can get on the road before lunch. We have had a nice visit. The kids got to play alot with their cousins here. Today was a busy day for the boys. Waffle House Breakfast, Library, Bowling (twice), Golfing, and baseball practice. I didn't even leave the house the house today. I should be rested enough to spend the day in the truck tomorrow.
Texas here we come.

more digi tags

Here are some more Tags I have made. I am learning to do this new digi design. It takes time to make one but I love to see what I come up with.

Loving my New Design!

Well as you can see I have a new design on my blog. It is so fun looking. Go check out Jennisa and Blog Yourself. She is so talented and easy to work with. She has alot of design options to choose from too. You will not be disappointed either. Thanks so much!
http://jennisajoydesign.blogspot.com/

The start of my trip

Sorry I have been MIA for a few days. I am in Mississippi at my grandparents home visiting.


Before I left to come here, on Friday night I went with SIL to her church for a Spring Fling for Women. It was nice. Food, Music, Facials, Games, Massages, and Foot bath detox. If you have never had a foot bath detox let me prepare you by saying it looks totally gross when you are finished. You put your feet into a foot bath that is a current of some sort of current going through it to pull all the nasty toxins our of you body. The first 15 mins is you blood stream and the second 15 mins. it detoxs your organs. It doesn't hurt or stink. It looks like you pooped and puked into the water by the time you are finished though. This is not a picture of mine but I found this on the net and it basically looks like this when you are complete.

I wanted to do mainly to help with my joint pain I have. It works.

Saturday I left for the 6 hour drive here at 6:52 am. Myself, Lauren, Wes and Lane will be here for the next few days. We are returning home on Wednesday. It has been a 1.5 years since I have been over here. I was ready for the get away and to see my family. The kids have been none stop since we arrived. The cousins have been playing well together.

My Nana and I have been going through things and having alot of visiting time. Since my mom died in 2000 we have become alot closer. She only had 2 children, my mom and her brother. They have both passed away and she looks to the grandchildren as her on kids.

It think my pop is going to take the boys to the zoo tomorrow and I am sure that Nana, I and Lauren will find some shopping to do. She loves to buy for the kids.

I am glad that I drove Chris's truck over here cause I will be coming home with way more than I came with.

My cousin Jennifer and her girls are going to come out tonight, they came over for a couple of hours last night also. They have been on Spring Break and have to return to school tomorrow so they are coming again this evening to visit before school starts back. We are cooking hamburgers and hot dogs tonight and will just visit and enjoy one another.

She Made it!

The stress of tryouts is over for this year. Praise the Lord!

A drunken 4 year old

What an interesting day it has been. We had Lane's EEG this morning.
A few days ago my SIL Sharon called and offered to go with me to take Lane for the test. Praise God she was so determined to go. I tried to tell her that it would be fine and that she didn't have to go. Both of us would have had to make other plans for the kids to get to school. I just didn't want to bother her with it, I guess. But she was determined to go and it really paid off having her with me.
Have you ever seen a extremely drunk "4 yr. old"? WOW! It was a wild morning. Poor Lane didn't really know what he was doing. To bad I didn't have a video camera.
I knew going into the test that he was going to have to have something to relax him. There was no way that he would lay there with all those leads on his head, and Be Still!
The medicine that was ordered for him made him so woozy and he even got a little aggressive. We tried everything to get him to lay still so he would just Pass Out. He wanted to walk around (himself), sit up, get down, go to walmart, ride in the wheelchair. He was just real irritable. Finally, Sharon was pushing him and I around in the wheelchair, and that was when it happened. I could feel his belly rumbling and we couldn't get him to the trash can quick enough. Lets just say I am glad we all wore Wind Pants today. He was passed out before we could get him cleaned up and in the bed. The rest of the test went well. We got home and he slept until after 2 pm.
It was so funny though, I didn't want him to be worried or anxious about going for the test, so I told him we were going to see how smart he is. His guess was a hundred million thousand sixty. He is almost too smart for his own good.
Over all it went good. The tech was telling us horror stories.
We go back on the 27th for our check appointment.

sucking up the dirty fuel

Friday night after moving beds around for the boys rooms my vacuum bit the dust. So Lane and I made a flying trip to Walmart to get a new one. Boy I didn't realize how much my old on wasn't picking up. I have used it everyday since then and I am still getting tons of dirt out of the living room carpet. I guess it is time to do a shampoo on it.







On the way home I noticed that my car was driving weird. Then Sunday Evening on the way home from Church my Service Engine Soon light came on. So yesterday Chris drove it to work to see what I was talking about. Well it died on him twice coming home. Sorry Babe, Glad it was you and not me. I am so thankful that we still have our older truck. We kept it for Dustin when he turns of age next month. I guess it will be my ride for the next week or so til I can get mine fixed. Beings it is going to cost me around $500 I have to wait til next week to do it.

My finances are a little slim this week because there is so much going on. I am supposed to pay $250 ded. tomorrow for Lane's EEG, not going to happen now. They will be Lucky I am paying less than half, I leave for Mississippi to my Nana and Pop's on Saturday. Well just the $ for diesel alone is going to eat my lunch. And Chris is going Friday to finish his Tattoo. That has been scheduled for weeks now. So since we do have 3 vehicles my Tahoe is back burner for a week now.

Today is Dustin and Alicia's 6 month anniversary. Oh first loves. It is so cute. They are really both good, smart kids. We love her and she is so sweet.

Thursday is a big day for us, too. Lauren has Cheer tryouts Thursday. She is trying out at noon because she runs track and has a meet that afternoon also. So they are letting those on track try out early. They will not know if they made it or not til after the others try out which won't be til 4pm. She will have to wait for a phone call. We also have to be at a funeral at 2pm, 20 mins away so hopefully things will go smoothly at try outs and we (Dustin and I) won't be late for the funeral.

It is for one of Dustins best friends' cousin. Her name is Hannah and she was born with an enlarged heart and had a heart transplant early on. She has battled with this all her life and it has been alot of ups and downs for her and her family. Well God called her sweet young soul home Sunday night. She has been in good health lately and just didn't feel well Sunday evening. Said she didn't feel good. Sat down after her bath that evening after 9pm and went home to be with her Jesus. Just like that. Just peaceful and painless. She was 10 years old.

One of the kickers to the story that has been bothering me is that my coworker's, that took her own life back in January, Husband and boys were there when Hannah died. Her dad and Laura's husband are great friends.

waiting for the weekend to arrive

A busy weekend ahead. I bought Dustin a new bed and will be getting it Sat. morning. With that comes much work. I will be putting 2 twin beds back into the boys room again. Maybe just maybe they will start sleeping in their room again. We took down the full bunk beds last night and cleaned out toy boxes. I bought this for their room yesterday while in town.

I put it together last night and it is ready to find a place in their room and be filled with toys. I will be busy tonight and tomorrow getting all this done.

I took Lane and Lauren to the dr and orthodontist yesterday. It was a busy day and a stressed one. We saw the dr for Lane first and it was really just a check up for medications. He has gained 5 lbs. since December on this medicine. But he is doing well on it. I can really see a big difference in him. We scheduled his EEG for next week. Then we also have put on another medication to help out the over stimulation he is having. Basically to keep him from bouncing off the walls. Leaving the Dr. office my car youldn't start and I was to be at the Orthodontist in the next 40 mins across town. Stuck in the parking garage I called trusty ol brother inlaw. And he came to the rescue. He let me use his truck to get my errands finished and then I went to get him from work so he could put a new battery on my car. $100 that I was not expecting to spend that day.

Wordless 3*4*08

Wordless Wednesday

Parents Beware of Song Lyrics

There are several blogs that I follow weekly and Michelle's blog is one of them. She did a post Saturday that has me blown out of the water. I was so shocked when I read this. I tell you I have failed as a parent. We are suppose to protect our children, raise them with good morals, and standards. And we as Christian Parents should protect them from the enemy also. I let my kids listen to this music, watch the videos and learn the dance. Heck they taught me the dance to it. There are always meanings behind the words of a song. We should really be researching the lyrics. Here is a link to that post, I really encourage you to read it and go to the links about the lyrics. It is truly shocking and you should come away from that site with a different outlook. I know I have!


http://michellekemperbrownlowwrites4kids.blogspot.com/2008/03/gettin-on-my-soulja-boy-soap-box.html

Took the Plunge

Well I broke down and did it. I finally bought a laptop and got wireless Internet. I should have gotten 4 more of them cause I don't even have a chance to get on it with all the kids and Chris wanting to get on. But I am glad I finally took the plunge.

I bought a nice Gateway from Best Buy for a really great price.

We are in TAKS this week so Wes isn't starting practice till the end of the week. Lauren is in Cheer tryout practices all week.

We are awaiting our new addition to our family to be born. Chris is getting a new puppy. And he has already named it and doesn't even know what she will look like. Her name will be Gypsy.