In blogging about addiction I have mentioned by brother Adam before. I heard from my sister last night, she brought me some "old" news. I say old because this is not the first go around. My brother is a drug addicted and has been his whole adult life and majority of his teen years.
I believe my brother was about 13 the first time I caught him smoking weed. I am assuming that he had been doing it well before the night I caught him. I know that he had already been drinking by then so there is no telling what else he had tried by that age. When he was around 16-17 he had admitted to doing alot of other drugs to me. Hard stuff.
After my parents divorce my mother had to send him to live with my dad in Houston. She had had enough of the drugs, lies, stealing and the cracked out friends that come along with that lifestyle. Not too long after that my mom was killed in a car accident, and he never made amens with her. That led him on a downward spiral of drug use and depression. Several years later he hit bottom and checked himself into rehab for cocaine use. He stayed there for 90 days and cleaned up. I was really proud of him. Keeping him from moving back to Houston I offered for him to move in with my family and gave him a job with our company. That was not long lived and I had to ask him to leave. He then went to my sisters. After several months of being there, he started getting back to his old ways again. Then it was on to a friends and then another....... Finally ending back up in Houston with my dad. Fast forward a couple of years. He has been doing well these past several months. Got into Culinary School in Jan. Doing great and loving it. Up until recently that is. Not sure what happened but a couple of weeks ago dad found Meth in the apt. and noticed that he was high. He has since been MIA for over a week, took the suburban, withdrew $600 from dad's checking acct. and has no cell phone on him.
My dad is beside himself, my sister is overly concerned, and I am just numb. I guess I feel this way because it has been going on for too long. The endless phone calls of what he has gotten into now; no job, no money, drugs, jail, stealing and the list goes on. He knows no other life style. Praise God he doesn't have a wife or child to take care of . He couldn't do it. He can't even take care of himself. He has never had too. He has been bailed out of everything "BAD" situation he has ever gotten himself into. All because of the guilt or pity he throws out to anyone that will fall for it.
Been there, fell for it and got screwed over. I have had my share days of worrying myself sick, crying myself to sleep and rubbing my knees raw in prayer for him. I just cant handle it this time. I am just now recovering from what I went through with my sister last year. Finding out that she was also an addict (prescription drugs) about did me in........
I use to have a hard time dealing with the fact that my family is full of addicts. I have brought it up in prayer so many times, read books and the bible on it. I am learning to cope with it. It is not something that I will ever truly understand. The drug/alcohol part of it anyway. There are addictions to all sorts of things and I am guilty of plenty. Just not ones that are mind altering so to speak. But I have something that is way more satisfying, Jesus Christ. He is the only one who can fill that empty hole in our heart. We could waste years trying to fill it with things, people, etc. But he is the only one that will fit in it.
I thank God that I am not following in my family foot steps and that I am not an addict of drug/alcohol. I am Saved by grace through faith and it is Christ that I put my trust into everyday to guard me from the tricks that Satan pulls on you to go out and get high! I pray that I will be able to break this spiritual curse that has been going on for years in my family. I also pray for their chains of bondage be broken. For them to turn their addictions over to Christ and ask for forgiveness, and Except Him in Salvation.
No comments:
Post a Comment