digging up something old

Our Women's Bible Study class is studying "Living Beyond Yourself" right now. It is an amazing study by Beth Moore. It is a study that encourages women to know the freedom of a fruitful, Spirit-filled life. We just finished the lesson on peace. Well not me actually since I am a week behind, but that is the video session we watched yesterday. If I am not mistaken I think I was the only one in the whole room..... I think she wrote that whole video segment for just me.
Have you ever experienced that before? The Lord spoke through her just to me, or atleast that is what it felt like.

It was moving. I left there so flustered, chest pounding, sick to my stomach. I just could not shake it. I have no idea why I felt that way.

Let me back up a few days, I had a doctors appt last week and on my way I called a friend at church to check on somethings she was going through. Before we got off the phone I had shared some really dark secrets, sinful areas of my live that I know no one else at my church knows about. Now this is an area in my life that I am completely ashamed of, but also the season of my life that the Lord pulled me back to Church and to him. I have had my eyes set on him ever since. It is not something that I am at all comfortable to share here because too many of you "I know" personally. Anyway she really made me feel better after sharing this with her.

Now back to Sunday, I left church and went to p/u Lauren from a friends house. On our way home I had to pass the church back up again...... I was scoping the parking area to see if her vehicle was still there. Yes it was. I pulled in and took off to find her. When I got in the fellowship hall I waited for her, as her stuff was still sitting there from early. And praise God here she came. Like I said before I don't know why I felt the way I did, but I knew that I had to get to her to talk with and pray with her.
You see there is alot left unsaid with my husband about that dark sinful area in our live. It is something that I put a cap on just as soon as the Lord told me to get out of it. But we have never really talked about it and I don't feel peace in my heart about that. I know that we need to discuss things but that would also mean for me to dig it up. I have just shoved it away, and not dealt with it. I think that the Lord wants us to talk about it, pray about it, and heal together over it.

This is a little sketchy, I know, but some suggestions or prayers would be nice. I am very clear that this needs to happen but the question is when and how.